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Thursday, November 10, 2005

Sappy, I Know

A few weeks ago I e-mailed two close friends and gave them all the contact information for my family members. I’m not expecting death or destruction, I wrote, but just in case…

One of the recipients thought at first glance that it was a suicide note.

It certainly was not. Life continues to expand and so does my joy in living it. But age is taking its toll, and not necessarily in a bad way. The recklessness and invincibility of youth is gone. Back in the day I used to tightrope walk on live electric wires strung high above active volcanos (or something like that). Today I feel dangerous when I cross the street with a flashing hand.

Sometimes I feel very fragile, like the thread that keeps me and everyone else here in this world is thin. This doesn’t make me sad, but appreciative. I love what I have in this world even if, like Dido says, I’m only renting it.

Also, these days I’m much less eager to conquer the whole world, and more driven to conquer just a small part. Aaron’s World. The same is true with dating relationships. Now there is enjoyment in stretching things out. The get-to-know-you phase can be savored, not crammed into a week or two. And if it doesn’t work, my life is still there and my friends are still there.

It seems lately that I’ve had many discussions about friendships. Each time, I feel grateful. My friends are my family as much as my family is my family and in some ways, more so. I don’t know that I have a “best friend.” Rather, I have several “favorite people” who sustain and renew me in different ways. Maybe sometime I’ll write more about these people, but I don’t feel that sappy at the moment.

Overall, this “getting older” thing is a good ol’ time, even if saying that makes me want to gag a little. In truth, I look forward to the years ahead. Even if my ass is starting to sag.

Posted by Aaron on November 10, 2005 10:22 AM

Comments:

I think sappy is always a little daring. Love you too.

Matty
November 10, 2005 7:22 PM

"getting old"!?!? You make me giggle, kiddo.

Roger
November 10, 2005 8:47 PM

I hate it when people talk about aging. Most of what they say is wrong, or at least it feels that way. The only bad part of aging is believing those things. Everybody of every age is great in every way they ever were.

jon
November 10, 2005 9:32 PM

It's nice to hear someone else say this stuff (so I don't have to). Your web of friends and family is the most important thing you can have. Let's hear it for those nigh-indestructible strands of connection.

As for aging, I just had to midwife a highschool friend through her 30th birthday. And was that painful!! She wouldn't listen to my well reasoned opinions on the merits of wisdom and experience. I finally bought her this really beautiful fossil at a conference that she can wear as a pendent (she named it Earl by the way). She says it helps her remember that she will always be young in comparison. :)

John
November 11, 2005 8:59 AM

I feel like you should collect all your personal narratives and have them published. This was as much of a joy to read as your pieces about religion and your bike-rides home.

(and honey, if your ass is sagging, mine's subterranean)

Haris
November 11, 2005 9:16 AM

Aaron my love,

Ditto Roger. Halfway from 24 to 25 is not "getting older." I'm 28, in the best physical shape of my life, my ass is not sagging (at least I hope it's not), and I'm still ready to conquer the world :)

It's all about your outlook. Age is but a number.

Adam Kendall
November 11, 2005 11:19 AM

"age is taking its toll"? Please. Since tomorrow I will turn 43 and Sunday I plan to work as hard if not hard than you on the volleyball court, I don't want to hear "age is taking its toll."

Bill
November 11, 2005 11:42 AM

"Getting older" is completely relative. When you're 11 going on 12, you feel like you're crossing the threshold from childhood to something greater. And when you're 24 going on 25, you feel like I do: Things are going well, every year gets better, blah blah. I can't wait until my 30s, 40s, and 50s. Well, maybe I can wait for my 50s. :)

Aaron
November 11, 2005 12:03 PM

Damn, Bill is old! Once again, fabulous writing AM!

betty
November 11, 2005 12:19 PM

Happy birthday Bill!

Adam Kendall
November 11, 2005 3:22 PM

Aaron... (I hope your boyfriend doesn't smack me around for this comment) Last time I checked your ass was definitely NOT sagging. About the other stuff though, I don't that you are being too sappy at all. One of the things that constantly draws me to you is that you are so genuine and not afraid (at least outwardly) to share your emotions. It is important to let people know how you feel, no matter what that entails. Anyway enough of my ranting. I hope everything else is going well and thanks for commenting on my blog (it makes me smile).

p.s. I don't think I am always stuffing my face, but what can I say I enjoy food and having a good time.

A2
November 14, 2005 8:37 PM

Aaron, c'mon your ass is not sagging! You crazy.

Shan
November 22, 2005 2:31 PM